Well, my mind is full to bursting at present. Can a brain actually burst? Would it be like when a body spontaneously combusts? I once burst a blood vessel in my brain, that was pretty surreal. They gave me a lumbar puncture, a procedure that extracts your brain fluid by putting a big ass needle into your spinal cord. 
There was a little blood in the fluid when it came out, so the doctor said it could be two things, swelling of the brain (goodbye cruel world) or a burst blood vessel. She also did admit that she was a little shaky going into the spinal cord, so the blood could have been a result of that. Which meant she had to do it again. That hurt, a deep pain like nothing I had ever experienced, and I have given birth twice.
When she was holding the vial of my brain fluid I asked her if I could have it, that I wanted to drink it, she said no, it is now bio waste, cheeky wench. That was my chance right there to evolve some super human, extracted, then assimilated brain fluid powers. 
I then had to go into the big pod like brain scanning machine so they could look for swelling of the brain, I was pretty spun out by this point and could only think about scenes from 2001: space odyssey, full orchestra going off in my head. 
So yes, my reality pitch is about to shift quite monumentally, am I ready? 
omg, wow! is your brain ok now? thats crzy, reminds me of back in the day when a lobotomy was all the rage.
ReplyDeleteI feel sick at the thought of a lumbar puncture. Why can't they just knock people out before putting them through shit like that? It's vaguely barbaric.
ReplyDeleteLumbar punctures are odd, I think you have to be awake, because the brain fluid is constantly changing and flowing, every 10 mins or so I think I remember her saying.
ReplyDeleteYes, it was quite mental. I am fine now, and the cause of the burst blood vessel is very mundane I'm afraid, the slamming of a car door.
Yep, you read that right.
I was totally fine, normal day in Landan town, I got in the car, slammed the door shut and felt something go pop in my brain. The instant pain was intense and quite scary if I'm honest. I rarely get headaches so this was off the scale.
My hubby drove me straight to hospital, as I was incapable of talking or opening my eyes.
The morphine pills soon sorted that out.
12 Hours later, I was back home, pretty rinsed and spun out.
Brain fluid is clear by the way, in case either of you were wondering. I was excpecting some iridescent fractal shit :0)
And there was an old man called Frank on the same ward as me who kept exposing himself to the nurse, after a lumbar puncture you have to lie on your back for 4 hours, so I never saw Frank's face, but I remember his voice.
NURSE: 'Frank, put it away please, otherwise I will have to get security'
FRANK 'NO'
NURSE: Please Frank, you cannot do this every time, come on, put it away'
FRANK: 'NO, you cant make me'
NURSE: 'Right, I'm getting security Frank, I did warn you'
Security are all busy in A&E, so the night porter comes in
NIGHT PORTER (Very camp voice) 'Right Frank, nurse **** has told me what you're up to, put it away, or I will put it away for you, okay Frank?'
FRANK: 'Get away from me, you big poof, you're not touching me, dont touch me'
Frank puts his penis away, for about 2 hours, then out it comes again